When I got back to the hostel, I started my whole slay process as usual. Found this low cut body hugging blouse and a size smaller denim jeans. Yes, you read size smaller. Size smaller because it will arrange and package all the bum bum very well so that at least if breasts no attract, nyash go attract.

This time, I didn’t want call any make up artist to help my slay ministry. Mission that I didn’t know what the outcome will be, I will now waste the small money at hand on make up artist. That’s how I started doing the make up o, and my brows refused to behave. One brow will look nice, the other one will go and have mind of its own. I will clean it, start again, get two perfect brows with two different shapes. Clean again, re-draw and get one brow looking like Nike logo. I was tired abeg. This slay queen ministry is not beans. It’s a full time job on it’s own, because you go out, work for your money, come back, invest in clothes, shoes, hair and make up. Tell me what the difference is between me and a banker that works for 30 days, collects salary, then invests in one business like that? Is it not the same investment that two of us are doing? My own investment might even be paying more than her own sef. So I started looking for a cheaper make up artist as the one I already knew was too expensive. After going round the hostel for over one hour, I finally found one. She was good and surprisingly cheap. After she finished my make up, I just told myself ‘New make up artist found’. I couldn’t be paying 6000 naira for make up when there was another good make up artist collecting 3000 naira.

I got back to my room to dress up so I could be on my way. As I finished wearing cloth, one of all these student preachers entered my room. God forgive me, but they irritated me, especially the ones that over do it and act like they’re the most righteous people in the world. More righteous than the pope or Daddy Oyedepo sef. As she entered the room, she greeted everyone and then came to meet me specially ‘Sister, do you have some time to spare? I want to share the word of God with you.’ She said. I knew it was because of the clothes I was wearing. In her mind, I was the devil’s PA and I needed salvation. I sized her down and replied ‘No, I am in a hurry. I don’t have the luxury of time.’ ‘Just five minutes, please. I won’t take more than that’ she answered back. All my room mates were already looking at me with corner eye. I knew that If I didn’t sit down and listen to the girl, I would be the topic of gossip that day. So I reluctantly sat down and told the girl ‘Five minutes o. No more, probably less’. She sat on my bed and asked me ‘Are you born again?’. ‘Yes’ I replied. ‘When did you become born again?’ she asked. ‘As far as I know, the bible didn’t say anything about having a particular date for getting born again. I know it says you are born again when you have been baptised by water and the Holy Spirit. I don’t think it’s on one particular day the Holy Spirit enters you. I think it’s a process. You might be ‘born again’, according to you idea, and not have the spirit dwelling in you. My bible doesn’t acknowledge that as being born again’ I replied. She stared hard at me for a while, she obviously didn’t know what to reply. Then she changed topic ‘I would like to teach you how to speak in tongues. That’s how people filled with the spirit communicate with God’. That one vexed me. ‘Look at how you’re contradicting yourself. You want to teach me something that the Holy Spirit moves people to do. Oya, I don’t want to learn how to speak in tongues, I know that one already. Come and teach me how to heal’ I replied. Aunty didn’t know what else to say. After staring at me for a bit, she stood up slowly and walked out of my room, with the laughter of my room mates escorting her out. I hissed, stood up, finished preparing and went outside to find a cab. Since I was miserly with my money, I didn’t want to call an Uber.

I easily found a cab and after negotiating price, I was on my way to Eko Hotel. The journey was annoying, because as the cab didn’t have AC, the windows were wound down and the breeze was messing with my hair. I couldn’t wind up because if I did, heat would kill me. I had my hair brush in my bag, so nothing spoil. When we got towards the hotel entrance, the driver wanted to drive in to drop me. ‘Wetin you dey do oga?’ I asked. ‘I wan go drop you for Eko Hotel na. Abi no be where you dey go?’ He answered. Droppers. So that people will see me coming down from this rickety car. My potential magas will now think I don’t have class. ‘No oga. No enter inside. No be Eko hotel I dey go. Drive forward make I come down’ I replied him. ‘Ok ma. But you for let me go drop you where you dey go’. He said again. ‘No worry oga. They no dey allow cab enter the estate’ I replied again. He moved forward and dropped me close to the exit gate. I walked into the hotel majestically and found the Eko Signature lobby. I found an empty seat, sat down, crossed my legs and started pressing phone so I would look busy. After sitting there for one hour, my battery was about to die and there was no show.  ‘Which kain bad luck be this na?’ I asked myself. It was like no one had noticed me while I sat there. So I decided to change position and move to the bar area. Best decision of my life, or not?

14 Comments on The Lagos Side Chick S1E11

  1. Omg… This story should be turned into a movie… Its a perfect story, and is mind blowing and captivating… Thumbs up

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